Despite The Tumor Shrinking Medical Miracle That Has Bought Her A Few Years, Hazel Has Never Been Anything But Terminal, Her Final Chapter Inscribed Upon Diagnosis But When A Gorgeous Plot Twist Named Augustus Waters Suddenly Appears At Cancer Kid Support Group, Hazel S Story Is About To Be Completely Rewritten.Insightful, Bold, Irreverent, And Raw, The Fault In Our Stars Is Award Winning Author John Green S Most Ambitious And Heartbreaking Work Yet, Brilliantly Exploring The Funny, Thrilling, And Tragic Business Of Being Alive And In Love. EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL.You will cry, because this is VERY sad.So a discussion occurred in my head after I rated the book view spoiler A voice in my head Come on You can t post that on Goodreads Me glares Why not A voice in my head aka VH Please, don t You will ruin your reputation Me weary Not that again VH Well, it s true You can t post that It s just not okay Do you have any idea how popular this book is Hint YOU CAN T EVEN GUESS.Me Why should I care Maybe some people think like me.VH You don t understand It s not just random book that you can critize like you do all the time and just get away with it This is THE FAULT IN OUR STARS And it s John Green Believe me, you do NOT want to get in the way of those crazy fans, nerdfighters or whatever it is they call themselves Me Really, what the fuck do I care I want to give this 3 stars It s not like I m giving it 1 star or something VH But why would you even do that in the first place EVERYONE, and I do mean EVERYONE in your friend list gave it 5 stars And they used so many sobbing gifs Really, it made me cry a little just looking at them Me stares VH It won the Goodreads award for best YA Me So Fifty Shades won Best Romance VH It s got one of the highest general ratings for a book on Goodreads Me Nobody but the Goodreads community actually cares And wait I m not even sure the Goodreads community actually cares I know I don t.VH You re such a cold hearted bitch Why would you give it only 3 stars anyway Don t you have a heart And why 3 stars I know you really loved the book, deep down Me I didn t I mean, I liked it, it was okay but I didn t love it It s I mean Oh, fuck it It s overrated There I said it Sue me VH seethes You did NOT just say that Me I did Because it is Come on, did you read the dialogues in this Can we talk about the dialogues I want to talk about the dialogues.VH crosses arms Go ahead I want examples.Me Fine I ll start with the popular quotes You know what I m talking about The quotes which are totally overrated and everyone loves them and they create pics and stuff when really, if you think about the quote in itself. Well, you realize that it just, you know, sucks VH mumbles How bout you suck Me What was that Actually, forget it, I don t give a shit Listen to this My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations VH So It s beautiful.Me Well tries really hard to refrain from laughing I mean Seriously Like fails miserably HAHAHAHA how pretentious can you get Comparing your thoughts to stars REALLY VH You re so shallow Some of us have deep thoughts, you know Like, thoughts so deep they actually deserve to be compared to the firmament I don t even want to explain to you how poetic this is, because I d waste my time Me Save yourself the effort, I don t mind And I ve got another example Probably my favorite That s the thing about pain It demands to be felt VH What now You re gonna say that it s so pretentious it made you cry Me Precisely nods wisely Because that s the thing about tears They demand to be wet Or that s the thing about food It demands to be eaten Or that s the thing aboutVH SHUT UP, I get it There s no discussion with you How am I supposed to discuss with someone who s got the intellectual depth of an empty oyster Me But come on, I m not finished yet What about Augustus and his unlit cigarette They don t kill you unless you light them, he said And I ve never lit one It s a metaphor, see You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don t give it the power to do its killing Me Is this supposed to be smart This is pathetic It s terrible, it s not funny, and it s not deep VH hisses It s a metaphor Me I know It s a metaphor, I said, dubious It s a metaphor, he said You choose your behaviors based on their metaphorical resonances I said Oh, yes He smiled I m a big believer in metaphor, Hazel Grace Me Can you say metaphor again Say metaphor one time Go ahead, say it, I think John Green hasn t totally forced it down my throat yet hysterical yelling LET S SAY IT AGAIN Metaphor Everything is a METAPHOR VH What s your point, you freak Me My point is, the dialogues are horrible It made my eyes burn It s pretentious and unbelievable, AND besides, you can totally see that John Green loves the characters.VH What author doesn t like the characters of their own book Me It s not the same With John Green It s like he adores himself I bet you anything he re reads his own books Just to see exactly how awesome they are VH What You don t know that You cannot possibly say that How dare you talk about him like you know him.Me You know, in the audio version of The Fault in Our Stars, at the end, there s an interview with him And he explicitly says that he just LOVES listening to the audio versions of his books So there.VH What No You re wrong He doesn t mean, like, he loves it when someone reads him his own books That s not what he meant AT ALL It s a misunderstanding What he meant was, he loves listening to the. the. reading lady Because she has such a sweet voice and everything Me Are you kidding me He s in love with himself Augustus is just an hologram An empty shell Seriously, his monologues are laughable I couldn t even focus I kept thinking of John Green while reading Because Augustus is just SO witty, so smart, so perfect cough cough wish fulfillment hello.VH I am so not convinced.Me There s this whole repetition thing, too I cannot believe how all the characters of his books look alike How come it works every SINGLE time How many books are out there, now 4 5 More, surely It s always the SAME THING Geeky and nerdy narrator, geekier and nerdier sidekick, mysterious but unbelievable girl, random plot that doesn t even make sense, road trip Come the fuck on You know what The fact that people aren t getting tired of him and his stupid same characters is the real question.VH But this book is unique The way it deals with cancer and death It s so beautiful You cannot possibly say it isn t.Me That s what disturbed me the most Look What I want to say is, not every death is glorious Not every death is epic and not every death will glow like a star in the eternal twilight sky Most of the time, deaths are random, plain, and the world is cold and uncaring, and that s how it is And that s what s terrible You don t need to be a hero, you don t need to defy death the way Augustus pretends to, you don t need to lose yourself in unbelievable speeches to have people cry over your death The book is just TOO much VH You know, about them being unbelievable when they talk You seem to forget something Augustus and Hazel ARE different They re unique, so they talk different That s what it s all about.Me They re not different, they don t exist They can t exist Honestly I don t think this was a good tribute to the kids who are really sick Because no one talks like that, NO ONE, and I feel like now there s this messed up hierarchy between the sick kids who are sort of smart ass and those who aren t And I refuse that I can t accept that Being ironic, jaded, detached and all metaphorical over the disease is a luxury that genuinely sick teenagers cannot afford So fuck this And I d rather kneel before a kid who has cancer and who doesn t know what a metaphor is than shed a tear over one of Augustus s stupid monologues.VH You liar, I know you cried while you read the book You were a sobbing mess.Me I wasn t I was a sobbing mess at the end of Before I Die And oh my God, I couldn t even speak after I finished A Monster Calls because I was crying so hard Me and Earl and the Dying Girl had me in tears, too These are all gorgeous books that deal with cancer And I cried like a bitch every single time, and they broke my heart But this I didn t cry.VH You did, and you know it Especially at THIS special moment.Me looks away I don t know what you re talking about.VH You cried when Hazel asked her mom if she would still be a mom after her death.Me Fine, okay I cried I know Okay I know But look That s precisely the point That s what I call emotional blackmail Because I DARE YOU not to cry over that discussion Because it s a universal fear Whether you re a mom, or a daughter, or both, if you have a sister even, you must have thought about that already and told yourself Okay, if I die, or if she dies Who will I be If my sister dies and I m asked whether I have a sibling, what should I say Am I still a sister because she existed, once Or if you have a child, and then one day your baby dies What happens then Are you still a parent Are you still a parent because once, you used to be a parent, and because there s a room upstairs that used to be your child s I dare you to think about it and not end up crying I took it as a betrayal from John Green because I feel like he didn t play fair OF COURSE talking about a child s death in this peculiar way will make the reader cry But it s so easy It doesn t require any talent Just ask anyone to talk about that and they ll be tearing up in 5 seconds Do you understand what I m trying to say I feel like he was like, I m gonna make them cry and all the while I was reading I swear I could hear him ARE YOU SAD YET ARE YOU HEARTBROKEN YET DO YOU SEE HOW INCREDIBLY UPSETTING MY STORY IS I KNOW, RIGHT I AMAZE MYSELF SOMETIMES VH But Me No, look Writing like that, it s not incredible, it s not magical and it s not valuable It s playing with people s weaknesses It s manipulating people into crying And I can t respect him with that the way I respect people who manage to make me cry without using such poor plot devices Like in, Me and Earl and The Dying Girl There s a cancer book that really took me by surprise Because, Rachel, the sick girl, is everything but admirable She s young, a bit shallow, nice, shy, plain, normal, really And her neighbor who befriends her, he doesn t fall in love with her And her death won t be remembered like something that scarred humanity, because it didn t Ultimately, it didn t even matter at all And I could relate easily to that, to the meaningless dimension of her death, to the emptiness of it all, than I could ever relate to the ridiculous speeches of Augustus and Hazel s too, for that matter Because you know what bothered me, too They re indistinct VH That s because they re soul mates That s the whole point of the book They found themselves in each other.Me It doesn t work to say they re soul mates Look, I read the book almost a year ago, I think And this I m in love with you, and I m not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things I m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we re all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we ll ever have, and I am in love with you Me This is beautiful, granted It s also unrealistic that a teenager would ever say that, let alone improvize it, but whatever, it s pretty But the thing is, I am completely unable to say whether it s Augustus or Hazel who says that I don t know I have no idea I try to recognize the style, but I can t tell, BECAUSE THEY TALK EXACTLY THE SAME.VH Me So yeah I didn t love the book, and I am not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things I didn t love the book, and I know this review might be just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we re all doomed to another John Green book about an unbelievable loser and his even loser sidekick loving an unbelievable teenage girl, and that there will come a day when maybe he will change his writing formula, and maybe that ll come when the sun will swallow the only earth we ll ever have, but then it ll be too late, so who cares I didn t love this book.VH suspiciously silent Me Are we done VH FINE Ugh Okay Waves white flag I surrender.Me Yes clicks save review hide spoiler Update 25 06 2014 Since I ve been receiving a lot of cyber bullies and hate messages, I m going to clarify few things Firstly, this is a negative review of the book and it has got a lot of potential to infuriate the fans If you think that your opinion is the only opinion that exists on earth and that no one should dislike your favourite book, then I would suggest you to avoid this review Secondly, This is my review and I have the freedom to analyse and criticise this book as I wish to without being told by others how I m supposed to criticise it I have the freedom to have my own thoughts and to express them in whatever way I want to and I don t appreciate fans shoving their opinions down my throats, I m not here to cater the needs of TFIOS fandom Thirdly, stop harassing me Why can t you get it through your thick skulls that everyone has different opinions, they re going to interpret books differently from you and stop being selfish to think that just because you loved a book that means the whole world should love it This world is full of people with differing opinions, differing thoughts and differing likes and differing dislikes, learn to respect them even if you don t agree with what they have to say about your favourite books Just because you love a particular book that I hate doesn t make you a good person and me a bad person, It simply shows that people like different things Every reader has the freedom to dissect and critically analyse any book and write their thoughts on it in their own review space without the fear of anyone or fans bossing them into writing what the fandom wants Critically analysing books and criticising problematic aspects of any reading material prevents people from being passive readers.Shakespeare and J.K Rowling too have their own share of critics then what makes Green s book flawless that it s not allowed to be criticised Honestly, this book is nowhere as good as the works of those two geniuses Stop thinking that criticising this book is sacrilegious Fourthly, stop cyber bullying and trolling me Your hate messages and death threats will show much of your personality than your love for this book Remember, every time you comment any bullshit here, you re giving your own fandom a bad name and my review popularity Also, your hate messages aren t going to put me down I m a strong girl and I m always going to stand up for what I believe in come hell or high water I don t fear anyone and no one can ever force me to follow their orders like a puppet especially not a fandom where most of the fans are immature cyber bullies who can t respect other s opinions Also, I ve caught fans making fake accounts to troll my review, this shows me that they are big cowards who hide their faces and send me spiteful comments Lastly, I m NOT shaming anyone for loving this book You can love whatever you want to and believe in whomever you want to I have no problem with people who genuinely love this book I have problems with those who think readers should not have the rights to express their dislike for any book, I have problems with those who approve of and participate in cyber bullying reviewers who write negative reviews on their favourite books, I have problems with those who refuse to acknowledge the fact that their favourite books can have flaws and not everyone s going to love them, I have problems with those who come here to shove their opinions down my throat Do you find anyone who hated this book shoving their opinions in comments of positive reviews Then what makes you think that you have the rights to troll negative reviews Alright, now let s begin with the review WARNING MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD Disclaimer I ll repeat once , if you cannot handle differing opinions or reviewers criticising your favourite book, please leave immediately EXPECTATION REALITY I ve re written this review because my previous one contained my angry rant and most of my points were incoherent.So I happily bought the hardcover of The Fault in our stars back in December 2012 after seeing the high average GR ratings and raving reviews saying how beautiful, life changing, thought provoking and blah blah it is Surprisingly, this book was so special that it became the first book that I slammed on the wall twice after reading it It didn t only disappoint me but also angered me I m surprised to find that harsh critics are swallowing up this trash and calling it a masterpiece Ugh I m going to make a list of everything I hate about this book that earned it the topmost place on my list of Worst books ever The characters Hazel and Augustus are the flattest cardboard cut outs I have ever seen in any book Both of them were like 60 years old stuck in some teenager s bodies making them very boring and unlikeable Hazel was such an annoying, stupid and pretentious Mary Sue that I wanted to punch her right in the face One great example of her stupidity Why are breakfast foods breakfast foodsLike, why don t we have curry for breakfast A nonhot boy stares at you relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of assault.But a hot boy well Augustus and Hazel have the same boring, pretentious, know it all and indistinguishable personality Hazel is the female version of Augustus no, I m not going to call him affectionately with Gus and he is the male version of Hazel These two characters meld together and have no depth at all I couldn t connect with them, I felt no pain and sympathy for them and they annoyed me so much that I wanted to stab them Romance It fell from the sky Seriously, I don t get what s so beautiful about the relationship between them They both fall in love within seconds just after laying eyes on each other love at first sight The romance is undeveloped and it comes from nowhere I was baffled when Hazel accepted to go to Augustus s house just minutes after meeting him WHAT THE HELL How stupid can you be You fall for a guy s words whom you met just few minutes ago and agree to go to his house What if he were a murderer or rapist Not to mention that the kissing scene in Anne Frank s house was so effing disgusting Anne Frank s house is considered to be a place of remembrance, a place where 2 families hid during the dark days of Holocaust If anyone makes out at such a revered site, they would be kicked out regardless of who or what they are People present around will be disgusted, they won t stand and watch much less clap for the lovely couple Writing Cheesy Emotionless Ambiguous Brain cell burning Want to hear some favourite quotes of mine Here they are My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations Why compare your thoughts to stars and constellations sighs Some infinities are bigger than other infinities That s the thing about pain It demands to be felt Yeah, that s the thing about chocolate, it demands to be eaten I believe the universe wants to be noticed I think the universe is improbably biased toward the consciousness, that it rewards intelligence in part because the universe enjoys its elegance being observed And who am I, living in the middle of history, to tell the universe that it or my observation of it is temporary Umm.What I m in love with you, and I m not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things I m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we re all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we ll ever have, and I am in love with you view spoiler hide spoiler I HATE this book Absolutely hate it Not just from the bottom of my heart which would literally mean my ventricles, and so, no but with my whole heart I hate it, hate it, hate it.I hate the fact that it made me laugh, so hard I hate the fact that it made me smile, so much I hate the fact that it made me chuckle, so profusely I hate the fact that it gifted me with so much Laughter, Smiles and Chuckles when I was expecting to come face to face with tragedy at any moment.it changed my expectations, made me believe in Something which did not happenor maybe did happen.I hate the fact that while Hazel Grace fell in love the way you fall asleep slowly, and then all at once , I just fell no warning, no time to process the myriad emotions coursing through me, nope, nothing, just a huge endless void filled fall and then a sudden crash that took my breath away, like literallyI hate the fact that I fell in love with this bound to end in oblivion, bound to end in disaster boy who stared with blue blue eyes and put the killing thing right between his teeth, but never gave it the power to do its killing Putting a cigarette right between your teeth and never lighting it, yes, that s Augustus Waters for you, people, a guy huge on metaphors and symbolismthat hopeless boy.I hate the fact that when I least expected it, the story, the words just grabbed me and pulled me in so deep that even the thought of ever resurfacing never entered my mind.I hate that the fact that right in the middle of my dance in the rain of laughter, dry wit, and humour without any warning, without any lightning as it s precedent, this thunder would stun me, startle me, wipe the smile right off my face, and sober me up, wake me up from the intoxication of the very real yet false jocularity spun by them, a humour which was nothing but human tragedy waiting to happen and had already happened in disguise and then push me back into that rain to dance again.I hate the fact that I m not making my much sense right now.that right now my thoughts are stars I can t fathom into constellations And yes, all the hate above is a metaphor, a symbolic word for love weird, right But right now I can t bring myself to say that I love this book.I don t, I don t, I don t yes, I do, I do, I do So, deep breath , it s a story of a girl named Hazel Grace Lancaster, a girl diagnosed with thyroid cancer at the age of 13 who s still alive at 16 thanks to a miracle drug which didn t work it s miracle in about 70% of the people but it did work in her So, even though her lungs suck at being lungs, she s still alive and well not kicking, but breathing, with difficulty because remember her lungs suck at being lungs , but breathing nonetheless She s been nothing but a terminal case ever since her diagnosis The doctors are simply finding ways of keeping her alive rather than removing the cancer ridden lungs and replacing it with a new one, because let s face it, her chances of surviving such an operation are like next to nothing and why waste a good pair of lungs on a given, bound to fail body So, Hazel has never been anything but terminal, her final chapter inscribed upon diagnosis.Enter Augustus Waters He s 17, gorgeous, in remission, and very frankly and much to her surprise interested in her It s a match made in Cancer Kid Support Group, in the Literal Heart of Jesus you ll know what that means when you read the bookyou ll laugh, trust me, you will He is a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointment in the Department of Having a Voice That Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin He s the unexpected, hot, gorgeous twist in her storya story which is about to be completely rewrittenTheir story begins with a staring contesthe stares at herSo she stares backbecause let s face it Spoiler Alert She wins And it progresses into something brilliant, something as bright as the stars, into Something with a capital S.I hate this book This needs indefinite repetitions, I hate it.I hate the fact that I fell in love with their always Okay I hate the fact that Hazel Grace took the words right out of my mouth when she said what she said about being a vegetarian I want to minimise the number of deaths I am responsible for, and about not knowing what s cool I take a lot of pride in not knowing what s cool I hate the fact that I fell in love with this blue eyed boy who drove horrifically and his cheesy and yet very endearing attempts to be Prince Charming but so with himthe surprised, excited and innocent side of him. May I see you again he asked There was an endearing nervousness in his voice.I smiled Sure Tomorrow he asked Patience, grasshopper, I counseled You don t want to seem overeager Right, that s why I said tomorrow, he said I want to see you again tonight But I m willing to wait all night and much of tomorrow I hate the fact that Hazel Grace felt like a grenade and all she wanted to do was minimise the casualities when not if but when she blew upI hate the fact that I felt sorry for a lonely swing seta Desperately Lonely Swing Set Which Needed a Loving Homeor maybe it was simply a Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Which Sought the Butts of Childrenand the fact that I absolutely love this sentence.The Lonely Swing Setor maybe Just Vaguely PedophilicAnd even though I fell in love the way you fall from a cliff or a building, don t really know how that feels..since I ve never done that..I hate the way she fell in loveI hate this kiss.because for who so firm that cannot be seduced And then we were kissing My hand let go of the oxygen cart and I reached up for his neck, and he pulled me up by my waist onto my tiptoes As his parted lips met mine, I started to feel breathless in a new and fascinating way The space around us evaporated, and for a weird moment I really liked my body this cancer ruined thing I d spent years dragging around suddenly seemed worth the struggle, worth the chest tubes and the PICC lines and the ceaseless bodily betrayal of the tumors I hate the love letter she wrote him Spoiler Alert It s a Venn diagram love letter I hate the fact that she did not agree with Maslow s Hierarchy of Needs in which Abraham Maslow, an American psychologist, claimed that certain needs must be met before you can even have other kinds of needs Something like thisUnless and until your needs of the previous level have been fulfilled, you don t even think about the needs of the next level Of course, like all psychological theories this one too cannot be generalized or accepted universally Because if there is one law in psychology then it is that there is no law in psychology, there is no given universal laws for human behaviour or thoughts or anything Every theory has it s use and flaws, applicable to some while not applicable to others And this one is not applicable in this situation Nope, not at all I hate the words, the word play in this book a quantum entanglement of tubes and bodies.triumphantly digitized contemporaneity I hate the fact that it made me laugh so much, smile a lot, fall in love so hard only to exact revenge later on for giving in to the false security of humour and love by making me cry.oh god, cry so much.so much Because that s the thing about pain, it demands to be felt I get ittotally get itI hate the fact that I ever read this sentence I lit up like a Christmas tree, Hazel Grace I hate it, I really hate it forget metaphorical resonances, forget symbolism, I actually hate it.I hate the fact that it made me cry so much that the lovers of god knows which century entwined on my pillowcase were drenched in the torrent of my tears and were probably ruing the fact that there was no umbrella during their time.I hate the fact that I stayed up whole night reading this book, half of the night crying, and even after finishing it I couldn t go to sleep, so the rest of the dawn just pacing in my room with all these haphazard, desultory stars jumping around in my mind finding absolutely no avenue to become constellations..and my eyes puffy Note to self Do not stay up all night or add crying to it if you do to avoid puffy eyes Why do I do this to myself And I absolutely hate thisI hate that this story is stunningly overwhelming, insightful, irreverent, raw and devastatingand to quote Markus Zusak, it s the kind of story reading which You laugh, you cry and then you come back for Some infinities are bigger than other infinities I m grateful for having known this little infinitygrateful for this epic love story of two star crossed lovers image error 1.5 stars.EDIT Changed the rating because it s gotten to the point where my sister and I have inside jokes on how stupid and shallow this book is I can t think about this book without getting angry.I have a history with pretentious people.My biggest mess involved two boys in particular who were so incredibly full of themselves that for the first time in my life, I openly expressed my dislike to them They know that I couldn t care less about their hotness or just how amazing they were So goddamn full of themselves, spoiled rotten, just overall horrible people.In short, my personality clashes with theirs entirely and there really is no chance of a friendship I d dive into it, but then this wouldn t be a book review.And so I move on The Fault in Our Stars is my first John Green book.Yeah, I know, but I didn t really get into reading up until maybe four years ago And I m not too into contemporary, but the opportunity presented itself and I took my first dive My sister is a fan of John Green She really loves Looking for Alaska and Will Grayson, Will Grayson and finds Paper Towns to be LfA s quirky New Girl twin that doesn t own up.I almost feel bad for disliking this book, but that s strictly on the idea of cancer Cancer is horrible, unpredictable, and the worst part is that it s your own cells mutating against you That s why it s so hard to defeat That s what I wish this book was about dealing with the cancer that wants to kill you Instead, I get a book about a fictional miracle drug that keeps Hazel alive so she can have a boy love her view spoiler then die not even on sight either hide spoiler At age twenty two, John Green worked as a student chaplain in a children s hospital Let s take a moment and consider all the implications of that, and why he is making a colossal understatement when he described the experience as devastating That was about twelve years ago, and Green has said in interviews that because of this experience, he s spent twelve years trying to write a book about kids with cancer not poster children of strength and courage and illness granted wisdom, but real kids and their families and friends who have to cope with the fact that they will die young All novels are personal, but Green s novels seem, to me, to be especially so But this one is personal in a different way With this novel, Green isn t trying to exorcize the memory of the girl who stomped on his heart in high school This goes deeper than high school romance and Manic Pixie Dream Girl angst This is about life, death, illness, love, heroism, and how a sixteen year old is supposed to deal with the fact that she will die and leave everyone she loves behind Maybe it s just because I ve been watching vlogbrothers videos for four years and feel like I m actually acquainted with John Green, but this is the most deeply personal novel I ve ever read This is not, as Hazel Lancaster might say, a Cancer Book None of the cancer patients in this story have a wisdom beyond their years, and they do not stoically accept the fact that they will die or fight heroically Hazel Lancaster, a terminal sixteen year old who has to carry an oxygen tank everywhere because my lungs suck at being lungs is refreshingly real not manic, not a pixie, not a dream girl She reads Great Books and watches America s Next Top Model marathons Augustus Waters, her amputee friend, wants desperately to leave a lasting impression on the world and philosophizes about heroism, and his favorite book is a novelization of a video game can I say how much I love that an author can establish a character s intelligence without telling us that they love reading Austen yes Stephenie Meyer I m looking at you Everything here is real, especially the diseases There isn t any bullshit about dying gracefully here, because cancer is ugly and unpleasant, and Green makes you feel Hazel s lungs struggling to breathe and the pain, and see the vomit and urine Remember how in A Walk to Remember, Mandy Moore has been secretly dying of leukemia the whole time but looks great even on her deathbed Nicholas Sparks can fuck right off for that insult to real cancer patients Most importantly, Hazel and Augustus are not defined by their cancer It consumes their lives, but it doesn t define them On every page, it s clear this is a story told by someone who hasn t known just one person with cancer, but has seen a multitude of children with terminal diseases, and has tried to find some way to comfort them and their families It s for that reason that I don t feel like I can review this like a normal book John Green didn t write this story for me, and so I don t feel like I have any place saying that it s amazing and beautiful and heartbreaking And I certainly can t criticize any of its minor faults All I can say, really, is that you have to read this for yourself, and go from there Okay, you guys know me better than that I have one big complaint, which I will describe here, and all I ask is that you remember that I still gave this five stars Augustus Waters, in the first few chapters, comes off as a pretentious douche When Hazel first meets him at a cancer support group, they re talking afterwards and Augustus takes out a cigarette and puts it in his mouth Hazel, who you ll recall is dying because her lungs cannot function, freaks out even though you HAD FREAKING CANCER you give money to a company in exchange for the chance to acquire YET MORE CANCER Augustus explains that he doesn t smoke the cigarettes, he just puts them in his mouth no, really because They don t kill you unless you light themAnd I ve never lit one It s a metaphor, see you put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don t give it the power to do its killing Augustus, I love you, but you re full of shit right there Notice how he didn t address Hazel s perfectly valid point that, by buying cigarettes, Augustus is giving money to the people who cause cancer Because here s the thing you can say to a cigarette company, I m buying your cigarettes as a metaphor, but I won t light them so I m taking away their power and they ll stop listening at I m buying your cigarettes because that s all they care about And it s a shit metaphor in any case you can walk around a mall with a shotgun and explain to people that because it s unloaded you ve taken away its power, but you re still going to get arrested So that was annoying, as was Augustus s general air of overly charming pretentious skeeziness in the beginning But I forgive him for it, because lest we forget, he is seventeen If his character was twenty two he d be the most obnoxious jackass on the planet, but because he s just a kid, I was willing to forgive him Still hate the cigarette thing, though. It seems silly that I have to say this, but I ve seen many a negative review of this book met with backlash from John s nerdfighter fans, so I want to make one thing clear I like John Green You ll find plenty who worship him as a god amongst men and many who are highly critical of him, I fall into neither of these categories but I do like him and I enjoy watching his videos I find him funny and I agree with a lot of what he stands for I also appreciate the amount of charity work he does and the way he helps the nerds feel better about themselves and make it out of high school a little less scarred than they might have been I like John Green But I do not particularly like this book There are plenty of people raving about this book on goodreads, on Kirkus, in various magazines and newspapers so I realise I am in a tiny minority I will also admit that I might not have felt the same if I hadn t already subjected myself to numerous cancer books but, as it is, I do not feel anything that unique or interesting has been brought to the table here For the first half approx , despite my lack of enthusiasm, I expected to give it three stars because I didn t consider it to be a bad book and it was well written enough however, as the book wore on, I began to realise that I was growing and bored and found myself struggling to read on This was something I hadn t anticipated I d prepared myself for many different possibilities heartbreak, a changed perspective on life and death, disdain, annoyance but not bored indifference Hence the lower rating.One of the first problems I encountered was that the kids were wise beyond their years And I don t mean intelligent, I mean wise They came out with things that really only suit people who ve been alive a few centuries like Dumbledore or Gandalf or at the very least people who are sat comfortably in middle age I like that Green doesn t patronise his readers by oversimplifying things or dumbing down characters in a condescending effort to appeal to teenagers, but these characters behave in a way that is unnatural to the point where sometimes it is verging on ridiculous It s not completely unbelievable that some kids exist who are actually like this, but they definitely don t all speak and behave in this way.The characters are all, in one way or another, John Green They all have his quirkiness, his sense of humour I was picturing several John Greens sat around having a conversation while I was reading The Fault in Our Stars In fact, reading this book was a little bit like watching one of Green s vlogs, which might have worked well if JG hadn t dampened the humour with philosophical musings As it was, I had a book that was trying so very hard to be both funny and sad at the same time and ended up failing to deliver either one as successfully as I would have liked The dialogue felt false and scripted because of the teens tendency to showcase their depth and intelligence Natural conversation between anyone of any age doesn t work like this and I couldn t shake the feeling that there should be a laughter track playing in the background.The Fault in Our Stars, in my opinion, would have been far better if Green had stuck to humour like Andrews did in Me and Earl and the Dying Girl I believe that the exaggerated characters and their unrealistic conversations would have been fine in a straight up humour book because that s not supposed to portray something real and deep and moving But Green loses it by trying to be philosophical and, in the end, I think he has produced a book that is as melodramatic and message driven as any other on this issue And his attempt to balance humour and sadness left me somewhat devoid of emotion throughout and provided fewer laughs than I d hoped.Ultimately, I feel that JG sacrificed humour in order to be deep and philosophical perhaps this book tried to be too many things, perhaps JG tried to be too clever But Me and Earl and the Dying Girl was a much better book, in my opinion, because it did the whole serious illness humour thing but didn t over complicate things by being philosophical Like I said near the beginning, perhaps I am just tired of these books and The Fault in Our Stars needs to be appreciated by someone who has not already exhausted themselves on similar efforts Blog Facebook Twitter Instagram Tumblr I must be clear from the beginning This is perhaps the most personal review I have written My choice of stars was difficult for this I am a self confessed John Green fan, I believe he is amongst the best of, not only YA, but fiction writers out there in general This is a beautifully written book There is very little to complain about in terms of style, plot, character, etc However I couldn t, in all good conscience, give this any higher because it sits so badly with me I have let this novel marinate for a couple of days now before writing this, and I just keep coming back to the same issues Namely Was this John Green s story to tell It is the human condition to attempt to find hope in hopeless situations But let me attempt to explain how watching a 17 year old fade away truly feels Because when the wit and words are stripped away I am not sure John did that.It is endless It is an unavoidable and uncontrollable and an all encompassing darkness where no hope or life or explanations exist.There are absolutely no life lessons to be gained from watching a 17 year old cease to exist There is no comfort The lessons that some may claim you can achieve through the darkest night of the soul reveal most of humanity for the selfish, narcissistic beings we are.I have come to believe there is a special kind of cruelty behind the perfectly cross stitched encouragement Those things are for the ones left over trying to make sense of the senseless.Whilst I believe this novel acknowledges that It tries not to, as the main protagonists claimed theirselves, set the victims of disease up as typical heroic, worldly wise characters, it still reads like a novel attempting to bring equilibrium out of disaster The victims ultimately still are wise beyond their years This, it seems, is an assumed side effect of a teenager coming to terms with their mortality They use metaphors and pretentious poetry and a sharp wit and are wholly unbelievable as real life teenagers They are constructs of an ideal They are the literary version of Dawson s Creek, using SAT vocabulary and existential navel gazing, whilst simultaneously slamming the typical genre for using its characters to do the same.Having lived this first hand once with a brother who ceases to exist at 17 and a second time with a brother who is currently 2 years NEC I am all too familiar with the need for light hearted humour at what may feel like the most inappropriate of times But what differs from that and attempting to write a disease ridden novel that attempts to make you laugh, is apparently personal experience I have the right to sit around a Christmas table laughing somewhat hysterically at nothing My living brother has the right to crack UNO ball jokes whenever the opportunity arises But none of the readers of this novel who have not experienced the kind of loss depicted here have a right to laugh at any of it You can not claim it as your own unless it is yours, and in my mind that is what humour does It is not appropriate for me to laugh along with eye jokes and blind jokes, because they are not my jokes I am merely a voyeur in another persons tragedy, I lay no claim to having the understanding of the experience necessary to allow for laughter.Again, let me make clear I can not approach this book outside of my personal experience Of course in reality I do not believe you have to have experienced everything to laugh at a joke But in terms of purposefully trying to create humour in a novel that is fundamentally tragic, for an audience that is mostly YA, I struggle with I struggle with it because the empty platitudes that are trying so hard to be subverted in this novel, are still being created It is still suggesting there can be lightness and humour within the terminally dark and it is suggesting it to people who have never experienced the terminally dark.This read like a novel where the author has truly witnessed the emptiness of teenage terminal illness, and thankfully appears to have become considerate and thoughtful for it As opposed to erring on the side of platitudes.But it still read as a novel attempting to explain where the hope in hopeless situations are.Perhaps because it is too raw a subject for me, or perhaps because the novel really is sentimental and gratuitous granted in a different way from the norm of this genre but this is not a book I would recommend.For sufferers, for family members of sufferers, or for well meaning people seeking to understand the hopelessness of some situations I would recommend it for none. As seen on The ReadventurerThe Fault in Our Stars currently has a rating of 4.74 on Goodreads, almost everyone I know has given it 5 stars, therefore I m certain no one would want to read my sour musings, except me and maybe a couple of other like minded and unimpressed.What I d love to know is this what makes a writer undertake the topic of cancer So much has already been written about it, so many Lifetime movies filmed, so many tears shed It literally has been done to death What new did John Green have to bring to the cancer table The way I see it, nothing Having your terminally sick characters be ironic about their illnesses and swap cancer jokes isn t groundbreaking.The Fault in Our Stars isn t a bad book, but it s a standard cancer book, and, sadly, a standard John Green book, with standard John Green humor and standard John Green characters speaking in the very same John Green voice You have a witty and intelligent protagonist this time 2, Hazel and Augustus a female and male versions of Miles Quentin Colin , a funny, slightly pathetic sidekick Isaac another version of Hassan Chip Marcus , a mysterious, unhinged girl, Gus s dead ex Alaska Margo clone , and, of course, the signature ROAD TRIP I can t help but recognize these people and this plot, I ve read all of Green s novels.I understand why so many readers would have such an emotional response to the book Nothing will get the ladies crying quicker than a kid dying of cancer Add in some long farewells, painkillers, eulogies and funerals you can collect buckets of tears But, IMO, here Green aims for the most obvious, the most easily accessible emotions, for the most typical life lessons And for all Green s attempts to be subversive and to make fun of cancer cliches inspirational quotes, heroic cancer survivors, etc he ended up writing about exactly the same things Frankly, I think The Fault in Our Stars is Green s weakest work to date, weaker even than half baked Zombicorns Because this, unlike his earlier works, feels commercial and intentionally tearjerky and insincere It will probably sell the most copies. This is me after I finished the book and whenever I think about it pointless EDIT Woooah 1000 likes I m surprised how many people are willing to read my little blurb of nothingness EDIT In a lot of peoples reviews I keep seeing they don t talk their age or They make these beautiful long speeches which is something that normal teenagers don t do and I have to point out that Augustus and Hazel AREN T normal teenagers They ve had to go through so much in their lifetime than a lot of teenagers will ever have to, and its aged them And quite honestly, this book wouldn t be as good if they were normal whatever that means sighs okay I m done, proceed with reading If you want to, I m just tiny words on a screen Do whatever you want.As much of an amazing writer as I want to be I m really not So I ll just point out the things that made this book amazing I knew that I would cry so I really didn t bother swearing not to cry What I didn t expect is bawling my eyes out I really didn t John Green has done an amazing job of making these characters feel so real to me When they cried, I cried bawled When they laughed, I laughed When they melted, I melted Their romance was so epic and I know, I KNOW, that this is a book I will read over and over again and cry every single time The characters were perfection Especially Augustus Waters Not only is his name Augustus which is epic in itself He had the guts to go up to Hazel and just straight up ask her to come hang out with him Nice guys finish last I think not You know this book was so awesmazing that I gave it its own tag Just look up there and you ll see a little tag that says the fault in our stars It was THAT amazing Seriously So amazing that I m pretty sure it was my first heartbreak from a book I really haven t felt that much from a book, much less a person, in a very long time I m kind of a loner and a commitment phob not a good mix But my heart didn t just do this 3, it did this BOOM didn t have a sign for that I wish I could write about this book, but I just can t explain the amazingness of it with my simple, unworthy words, so I am going to tell you what you NEED to do READ IT John Green.John Green.John Green.You re not like Peter Van Houten, are you What have you done to my brainand my heartI m not gonna review how exquisite John Green can write, or how he can create characters as special as Hazel Grace and Augustus Waters, or how amazing he can tell a story Despite the huge number of ratings and the spectacular average rating, this book is not perfect You might find it unrealistic, because if there are many of us who see the life and its complexity like Hazel and Gus do, this world will be such a happy place So like any other book, this one also might be a miss or a hit If it s a miss, then you can say it s not worth the hype But if it s a hit, it hits hard Everything in this book the characters, the story, the words, they all have the power to be an inspiration If you haven t read it, I suggest to take the chance.